Why are pregnant girls on dating apps

New study reveals that dating while pregnant is one of the final taboos for single mums-to-be

(London, 30 July, 2015)  - The majority of single pregnant women are refusing to let their impending arrival and societal stigma stand in the way of finding a new partner, according to research conducted by BabyCentre. 61% are either already dating (13%) or keen to do so (48%), despite the fact that the vast majority (86%) feel they will be judged for dating while expecting.

The research, carried out by the #1 digital pregnancy and parenting destination worldwide among over 400 pregnant women, found that expectant mums who find themselves single are following in the footsteps of supermodel Heidi Klum* and TV characters Rachel in 'Friends' and Miranda in 'Sex and the City', by pursuing love. Single mums-to-be are hoping to find companionship (51%), romance (45%) and a life partner (40%) over sex (18%) or finding a father figure for their child (18%). More than a third (37%) said they wouldn't even consider sex with a new partner during pregnancy.

Despite the fact that a quarter of families in the UK are headed up by a single parent – with this having been the case for over a decade** – BabyCentre's research suggests that dating in pregnancy is one of the final taboos for single mums-to-be. 71% say there is a stigma surrounding dating during pregnancy, with 64% feeling they can't even tell friends or family that they are dating or considering it. Of those that have told their loved ones, 58% report a mixture of positive and negative responses, with many saying that friends and family told them to focus on the baby and not on finding a relationship.

When asked about how being pregnant changes the way they feel about dating, the women reported feeling self-conscious (56%), less attractive (40%), and embarrassed about their pregnancy (18%). While one in five (19%) feel exactly the same as when they are not pregnant, only 3% feel more attractive, and only 17% are proud of their pregnancies.

Sasha Miller, International Managing Editor of BabyCentre, comments:
'I don't think we should be surprised to see that some single mums-to-be choose to go on dates while they are pregnant. Ideas about pregnant women dating may be slow to evolve but the whole attitude to dating has changed enormously in recent years. If you're single, going on dates with new people, perhaps who you've met online, is likely to be a normal part of your social life. Most women who took our survey were looking for companionship from their dates, not sex. Meeting people online makes it easier to build a friendship and emotional rapport with someone long before you've met them.

'But that's not to say it isn't complicated. There's no doubt that carrying another man's baby adds complexity to any potential new relationship, and pregnant women will always be thinking about what's best for their baby, as well as for themselves. For some single women, that means turning to friends and family for comfort and support. On BabyCentre, we certainly see many single women getting incredible support from friends they have met in our online Birth Clubs. But for others, getting out and meeting new people is an important part of who they are. BabyCentre supports all mums, whatever choices they make and we strongly believe that just because a women is dating doesn't mean that she can't be the best mum possible to the child she is carrying.'

Of the single mums-to-be, 62% were in a relationship with the baby's father when they got pregnant, with 22% citing the pregnancy as the reason for the break-up. Almost half (46%) have already used, or would use, online dating and dating apps (such as Tinder, Plenty of Fish and Match) to find dates, with the same number seeking recommendations from friends. 23% say they look for dates at bars, parties and social events, while 16% are looking for love at work.

If you are single and pregnant, BabyCentre offers these dating tips:

Be honest
If you're not showing, it may be tempting not to mention your pregnancy on a first date, but you'll enjoy yourself more if you're open about it. If he runs, you've saved yourself from wasting your time on him.

Be clear about what it is you want
If it's a relationship you're after, don't entertain dating men you know play around or who have indicated in an online profile that they aren't interested in anything serious. You don't need the stress or upset of being messed around.

Choose a venue for your date that you can both enjoy
Pregnancy and alcohol don't mix so it might not be much fun meeting in a pub. Level the playing field by suggesting somewhere alcohol won't be a factor.

Don't jump in before you're ready
It's normal to feel a bit vulnerable when you're pregnant, even more so if you've recently split with your baby's father. Think about whether going on a date is what you really want to do, or if that gap would be better filled by friends and family.

Do your research
There's no law against checking out your dates on social media. In fact, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram accounts can be very insightful and help you build up a picture of your date.

Take precautions
Going on a date doesn't mean you're going to have sex, but if you do take that step, make sure your new partner uses a condom. Although you don't need to worry about contraception, you do need to protect yourself from sexually transmitted diseases which could harm your baby.

ENDS

Notes to Editor

*Heidi Klum was expecting Flavio Briatore's baby when she started dating Seal, who later became her husband.

**Statistic from Gingerbread, UK charity providing expert advice, practical support and campaigns for single parents.

Research conducted in June and July 2015 amongst 498 BabyCentre members.

Press contact

Sarah - Managing Editor, BabyCentre UK

sarah.redshaw@babycenter.com

01603 692286 / 07940 196181

About BabyCentre
BabyCentre reaches 8 out of 10 new and expecting mums online in the UK, and is the #1 pregnancy and parenting digital destination worldwide, reaching more than 40 million mums and dads monthly in 10 regions from Canada to the Middle East to China. Over 3 million parents and parents-to-be in the UK visit BabyCentre for helpful information and support that's Remarkably Right ® at every stage of their child's development.

BabyCentre also leverages its industry-leading audience engagement to provide unparalleled insights and innovative marketing solutions to the world's top brands, retailers, and institutions. BabyCentre was recently awarded The Information Standard, a health and care certification programme supported by NHS England. The Information Standard accredits BabyCentre as an official source of reliable, high quality health and care information.

Last reviewed: September 2019