Single guys guide to dating in san francisco

Wondering where to meet singles in San Francisco? In college, meeting singles was easy – wasn’t it? 

Walk out of your room and you’re immediately surrounded by thousands of eligible women your age. Making friends in college was as easy as explicitly asking someone on your floor to get a bite to eat, and bam, you have yourself a friend. Those were the golden days of building relationships. Nowadays, we have to work a bit harder to meet singles, especially in San Francisco. Let’s unpack that last part for a moment. 

Ahh San Francisco, land of the innovative, land of the future, and land of the dudes. Stats may vary, though most sources will tell you that San Francisco houses between 12-25% more men than women. If you have a penis, then I apologize. More men to choose from means that women can be pickier when choosing a mate. This gender disparity along with the workaholic nature of Silicon Valley are the perfect ingredients for a hookup culture. 

So what does all this mean for you?

Competition either lights a flame under your ass or burns your pants off. If your pants are still intact yet you feel a slight burn under your tooshie, it’s time to launch an all-out offensive. Landing a relationship in San Francisco (especially compared to Los Angeles) won’t be the easiest game you’ve ever played. Luckily, you’ve got someone to pass you the cheat codes. The first step towards finding your female counterpart is knowing where to meet singles in San Francisco. Shall we begin?

Where to Meet Singles In San Francisco: Marina Safeway

What’s the antithesis of meeting someone on a dating app? 

Ask any octagenarian and they’ll tell you it’s meeting your new lover at the supermarket. Meeting singles at the supermarket is one thing, but doing so at the Marina Safeway, has its own flare. Many a San Franciscan will tell you that placing a bunch of bananas in the child seat of your shopping card is Marina Safeway code for “I’m single and looking to mingle.” It’s at this supermarket that phallic veggies and vulva-like fruit fully embrace their connotative meaning. 

While singles looking for an alternative way to meet their new flings do happen to peruse the aisles of “Dateway” keep in mind that most of the people in here are just trying to snag some avocados and bounce. It’s a supermarket first and probably the most indie way to meet your wife second. 

Year-Round Festivals

The next couple of months will see numerous festivals dominate the social scene in San Francisco. Food, art, and music festivals abound right up until the chilly days of late autumn waft on in. Festivals elicit the extrovert in all of us.

With so many vendors around we feel compelled to ask questions, speak to strangers, and open up. This is the perfect scenario to meet other singles. Grab a pal -male or female- and take to the streets. Worst case you don’t score a number you’ll still walk away with some killer kettle corn. 

Off The Grid: Every Friday Night March Through October

Sharing food with one another is the oldest human pastime there is. Offering another a cup of tea or a piece of brisket awakens an ancient part of us. Humans have a deep seated desire to break bread and bond with one another. This urge is coaxed out of us even more at Off The Grid’s Friday night food festival. Grab a Texas-style brisket and make small talk with a stranger as you two keep warm at one of the festival’s communal fire-pits. 

If you prefer to operate in more intimate venues, there’s always Presidio Twilight on Thursday nights. Same vibe and food at Off The Grid’s Friday night spectacle, just less competition.

Saturdays At The Great Meadow Park At Fort Mason

No matter where you are, parks are great spots to meet women. But in San Francisco, parks take on an almost mythical tone. With our ubiquitously sour weather, once the fog dissipates we flock to parks. They become areas where we once again realize that there’s a world outside our living rooms and dank bars. A park like The Great Meadow Park at Fort Mason is where single women come to stretch out, bask in the sun, and open themselves up to the great outdoors. 

Thursday Nights at California Academy of Sciences

If you love soccer, you’ll meet you dream girl at a San Jose Earthquakes supporters bar, if you’re a developer you’ll probably meet your true love at a coding Meetup, and if you’re a science geek it’s not rocket science, just common sense that a woman that shares your interests will be moseying around the planetarium exhibit next Thursday evening. 

But why Thursday you ask? Well because on Fridays everyone’s at the Off The Grid food festival, duh. 

Your Gym’s Workout Classes

Be careful here. You may have just read, “At the Gym,” that’s not at all what I’m advising. Gym rats -male or female- generally don’t want to be bothered while their blasting Eye of the Tiger and doing squats. However, the vibe completely changes at workout classes. 

Bonds are forged via a connection. That connection can be religious, food-oriented, or in this case, sporty. Exercising together is one of the best ways to quickly accelerate a relationship. Ideally, your gym workout class encourages teamwork, but it’s okay if it doesn’t.

What matters is that you two have just gone through something intense together. Whether she knows it or not, you two just embarked on a journey. The fact that you two ride a bike, take salsa classes, or punch the stuffing out of things once a week every week means that you’re basically paving for a way to start a conversation with her. After class is over, simply comment on the class you two just took together. No worries if you don’t snag her number the first time you chat, you know where to find her in a week’s time. 

If you’re a local to SF, I’d recommend a spin class by Danny Baker.

Dolores Park

You know you’ll be able to find a woman with a common interest at Dolores Park. That’s right, even if you’re a fan of tree shaping, at Dolores, you’ll be able to find your people. Dolores is home to single women lounging, single women playing tennis, single women walking their dogs, etc. 

Jaxson Bar

Be warned that Jaxson attracts a younger, frattier, and more country milieu than you’re used to in the San Francisco Bay Area. That being said, people here actually dance. I’m not talking about a line of socially inept dudes swaying in the corner while leering lasciviously at women, but rather both men and women breaking it down on the dance floor. C’mon now, when’s the last time you busted a move? 

Hit Up a Classy Happy Hour at Sens

Happy hour is probably the most appropriately named thing ever. Ask the average employed person what they need more than anything after work and invariably they’ll tell you, a beer. It just so happens that at happy hours, those heavy with the baggage of work are able to take a load off in the happiest way possible. Happy hours are cheap, full of buzzed people glad to finally get off work, and perfect for meeting employed singles. 

Sens, in particular, is an upscale bar, right on the Embarcadero. Their rooftop bar overlooks the Bay Bridge and Ferry Building. If you do hit up Sens, be sure to tell my favorite bartender, Jason, that Emyli sent you.

Harry’s On Fillmore

Some singles bars can get trashy. Harry’s isn’t that spot. Solid mixed drinks, wood everything, and a speakeasy vibe make this spot a go-to for singles. Harry’s has many different personalities. Sometimes it’s a place where the boys go to watch the game or where the dancers go to flex a move. It’s definitely one of the best bars for singles in San Francisco. 

Find an Eclectic Coffee Shop Near Your Home & Be a Regular

San Francisco boasts 307 coffee shops for every 100,000 residents. That’s more than any other city in America. Considering the numbers are in your favor it shouldn’t be too difficult to find an off-beat coffee shop in your neighborhood.

Becoming a regular at a coffee shop means getting to know the lay of the land, the ambiance, the employees, and of course the clientele. Once you’ve laid claim to your local coffee shop it’s time to make small talk with other regulars. Generally opening a conversation with a complete stranger is a tough ask, but not when you’ve got things in common. You two don’t need to have fairytale compatibility, a shared interest in quality coffee is enough to get the conversation started. 

When in Doubt, Bust out a Dating App

Nowadays you don’t need to leave the comfort of the couch to find your new bae. In a tech-forward city such as San Francisco, residents are more than accepting of online dating. Meeting women at IRL events in addition to through online dating will give you a 360-degree dating strategy. You just have to figure out which app is right for you. 

And When You’re Ready For the Date

Now that you know where to meet singles in San Francisco, you’ll have to figure out where to bring your lovely lady on a first date in San Francisco. Take a good look at the first date spots in the aforementioned link. For some extra ideas on where to take the woman you just met at Harry’s, see below…

Cigar Bar: Salsa Dance Venue

Every Saturday, you and your new lady can take $7 dance classes at the Cigar Bar. Surely she’s never gone salsa dancing on a first date before. Make it the type of first date that guarantees a second date. 

SalsaCrazy at Neck Of The Woods

First dates that take place on the weekend versus a Monday have a different vibe. A weekend first date that takes place at night comes with certain expectations (and I never recommend setting up a first date after dark). Most likely she chose you over hanging out with her friends. This means that you now have to perform.

If the date isn’t as enjoyable as if she were to kick it with her friends, you’ve failed. Luckily, there’s a way around such an expectation. Just go out with her midweek. At SalsaCrazy, you can take beginner or intermediate salsa classes every Monday at Neck of the Woods. 

The White Horse

Established in 1742, The White Horse looks centuries older than most buildings. Sure the aesthetic is pleasing, but did I mention it’s also one of the most pocket-friendly joints in Lower Nob Hill? This tavern can provide an intimate atmosphere that’s perfect for a quality first date conversation. 

Clock Bar

Hotel bars are often overlooked. People don’t realize that just because you aren’t staying at the hotel doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a cocktail or two. This bar is great for both meeting singles and first dates. Take advantage of the fact that the public is either unaware or feels too awkward grabbing a drink at the Clock Bar. The lack of fellow patrons will make you and your lady feel like the king and queen of the castle. 

Conclusion

For most unclaimed men, figuring out where to meet singles in San Francisco is the hardest part of being single. You can have all the social skills in the world, but if you’re not meeting singles, your suave gift of gab won’t do you any good. Don’t relegate yourself to prowling dank bars and swiping endlessly on Tinder.

Knowing where to meet women is one thing, but having the motivation to get out there and mingle is a different skill. If you’re having trouble meeting women, I know someone who can help… me. 

Look you can take all the armchair advice you want from your married friends, or you can heed the advice of a professional wingwoman. My 3-month Signature Program has helped a myriad of men create meaningful romantic relationships in a short period of time. To learn how to find your next girlfriend, book a 1-on-1 New Client Zoom session for this week.